March 6, 2009

Still Sexual After All These Years

In 1985, when I first realized I might be infected with the AIDS virus, I made a bargain with God: I'll never have sex with another man ever again and maybe I don't really have it. Later, that bargained morphed into: I'll never get fucked in the ass again because that's the most direct way to get it, and I'll be OK.

The No Dick in the Ass Era lasted for six whole years, though the latter part of that era was seen as a sort of new virginity bargain: I'll wait until I'm with my lifelong partner before ever getting fucked in the ass again. Of course, after I meet him.

By the 90s, I was through bargaining. Eventually, I found my way back to sex, even feeling sexy, something I never felt pre-HIV. Now, in the 21st century, I'm showing my body on the Net and telling the world shit like, AIDS Is All In Your Mind, and Kiss Me, I Have AIDS.

Man, I love still being sexual after all these years, especially while living with AIDS.

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