June 30, 2008

How Big Is My Dick?

Do I have a big black dick? How thick is my cock? What's the head like? Am I cut or uncut?

These are all questions I've been asked by the world. Funny, the world has never asked me about the size of my heart or how much brain power I've got going on. If I had a dollar (or a hug) for each time a man or woman has asked me about my penis size, I'd be one rich and not-so-lonely man.

My penis is a beautiful extension of my being. My dick provides me a whole lotta fun and comfort. I love it. I'm happy with it. But my dick is no more or less important to Who I Am than the other body parts that allow me to enjoy life. It's been a pretty good relationship, my dick and me, without having to measure its worth.

Only once did it ever occur to me to assign my penis a numeric value. At the age of nineteen, I met an incredibly huge dick, er, dancer who granted me the privilege of beholding his big black member. Amazing is how I describe the journey, all the way up, then all the way down the seemingly endless dark and hardened shaft, its thickness barely contained by my hand.

Some time later, I was alone in my apartment, the college roomies were gone and I had dick on the brain. I found a ruler to see how my penis measured up. Then I realized I wasn't aware of any official method of measuring one's penis, which made me very unsure whether or not I was going to be happy with the ruler's official ruling. After one crack at measuring, I aborted the mission, choosing ignorance and bliss over assigning myself another ID number.

When I was granted the privilege of beholding the black dancer's amazing extension a second time, I asked him about the value, er, length of his third leg. His answer changed entire my point of view:

"Remember, it's a penis attached to a man, not a man attached to a penis."

The seed was planted. The shift in perspective one I would behold the rest of my life. There were so many other things to be than just a penis, and so many other things my fellow man could become to me.

Shortly after the big dance with the big dancer, I dropped my curiosity about dick size altogether, his dick size, my dick size, and any other man's. Thanks, manly black dancer with the very manly black penis. You helped me realize, when it comes to size matters, so many other things about a man matter so much more.