To Be Semper Poz

I wish gay men of today could step back in time and re-live the 1980s AIDS Panic that changed the world.

Maybe then the gay men of today wouldn't be so disease-free and bigoted.

Maybe then the gay men of today wouldn't be starring in their own version of AIDS Panic II: the 21st Century Sequel.

See life from my funky point of view in the funky posts labeled Semper Poz.

What Makes Being a Fag Worthwhile

There's this campaign that tells young gay kids, It Gets Better, meaning life gets better after you grow up and no longer have to be gay-bashed at school.

Take it from this 48-year-young gay kid: it definitely gets better.

The best sign of better things: You'll be in the midst of some really great sex--hot, sweaty, passionate--and you'll think to yourself: This is why I'm a fag.

This is why I put up with all the world's shit about men who have sex with men: to feel this good with another man, to feel this alive, this free, this connected, this content, this much on fire, this much in love with sex and life. And cock. Or ass. Or holding onto another man, kissing another man. Or just lying naked together. Or doing whatever the fuck we want.

This is why I'm a fag. This is what I survived my youth for, what fought for the right to be. Me.

This is me. This is where I want to be.

This is what makes being a fag worthwhile.

Tighty Whitey Time

As fall turns to winter, my body longs for a change of pace in the underwear department.

While summers seem made for sweaty jockstraps or going commando, the colder months always find me in the mood to snuggle my ass up to that old-fashioned standby, the tighty whitey.

Like a cup of hot coco or a firm hug, tighty whiteys give me that extra sense of comfort as nature chills life.

Or maybe it's just me, dreaming of hanging out with my buddy in front of warm fireplace, snuggling together in our tighty whiteys.

Follow the Light

Dream buddy.

The one who is perfect for me and for whom I'm perfect.

Complimentary interests. Compatible tastes. A lifetime of adventure.

I've yet to meet this dream buddy but I still have hope.

Hope that I'll turn the right corner at the right time, or he'll pick me out from a crowd, then feel compelled to follow the light.

We'll meet, smile, shake hands. And a lifetime of adventure begins.

Nude Intentions

Attention young people! Don't post nude pics of yourself on the Internet!

Wait until you're much older and more mature, say, 48 years old.

Hold off until you have a really good reason, like showing the world how a man can be proud of his naked body, even after living with HIV/AIDS for 25 years and counting.

I repeat: don't post nude pics of yourself on the Internet. And give away everything.

Always leave them wanting more funky pics.

Pussy Curious

Am I gay? I dream of eating out a woman's pussy.

Am I a top or bottom? What if I like both top and bottom?

Am I black or white? What about my light skin and the white man's DNA running through it? What about Native American blood inside me?

What the fuck am I? lol

A man who doesn't fit into boxes, who wants to be with another man who doesn't fit into boxes, so we be buddies for life, make funky, sweaty love, and think about eating out women. lol

I, Male Sexual Dawg

Why this funky little blog? Because another generation of young men are ashamed of their HIV-positive status and they need to know: you can still be healthy, happy, sexy, proud and poz.

Because nowhere else in the media is someone like me portrayed as happy, healthy, sexy, proud and poz.

Because when I'm much, much, much older, fate willing, I can look back at my funky little blog and see how I was once a happy, horny, male sexual dawg.

23 Years Old and HIV-Positive in 2010

To be 23 years old and HIV-positive in 2010 is not uncommon, but it's quite a shock to someone who was once 23 years old and HIV-positive--25 years ago in 1985.

Twenty-five years ago this month, Rock Hudson died of AIDS. The entire world was gripped in the AIDS Panic. The AIDS Monster was the number one terrorist worldwide.

At the time, I was 23 years old and HIV-positive. I was an AIDS Monster and couldn't tell a soul. I heard the AIDS Panic in people's daily conversations. I heard the AIDS jokes. When the entire world was obsessed with AIDS, I had AIDS and the world didn't know it.

And I survived, twenty-five years and counting. I survived to witness a second AIDS epidemic, currently infecting the youth of America. The difference in 2010: the AIDS Monster gets no hype, no media attention, no buzz.

But young kids in America are being infected daily, mostly because they possess very little training in the survival tool known as safer sex. The result: I, a longtime survivor of HIV/AIDS, now see young men and women on the net who are 23 years old and HIV-positive, as I was 25 years ago.

My heart breaks a little each and every time I see someone who's young and HIV-positive.

You can live a long, full life, I tell them, giving them a brief recap of my success story. Anything is possible. Keep dreaming big.

Thanks, they'll tell me. Many of them tell me how it helps, hearing my story. Seems to make them feel a little better about themselves and their chances for a happy, healthy life.

That alone gives me comfort when I think about the young men and women who are 23 years old and HIV-positive in 2010.