Sexy, Confident, Comfortable, Poz

Where in the world can you find images of a black, gay, HIV-positive man feeling sexy, confident and comfortable?

We live in an age filled with countless images from countless sources, yet rare is the opportunity to see images of anyone like myself being happy, healthy, sexy, sexual, alive and well, and dreaming of loving and being love, like any other soul.

It's as if the world can't imagine a black, gay, HIV-positive man feeling sexy, confident and comfortable. Fortunately, the world doesn't have to. I'm going to imagine it for them. Click here for more funky pics.

Scent of a Jock

My ideal man is someone who doesn't feel gay or straight. Someone who gets turned on by the idea of us having a three-way with a woman. Someone who loves the smell of his jock! And the smell of my jock!

It wasn't difficult getting hooked on the scent of a jock. For most of my early life, the only kind of men I knew wore sweaty jocks. Is it any wonder, after all these years, I'm still Jock Crazy?

Dear Ryan White, Wish You Were Here

Dear Ryan White,

Wish you were here to give me some perspective on what your generation has made of the post-AIDS Panic world.

They came up with a term: Disease-free. They use it on this thing called the Internet.

Wish you were here to tell this modern world how it makes you feel, hearing people use the term, "disease-free."

Read the rest of Dear Ryan White, Wish You Were Here, now on my author blog.

Is 'Neg Only' Sexy?

When a guy puts up a personal ad that says, NEG ONLY, here's what he's really saying:

My little mind is only capable of processing so many things in life, and one of them is, AIDS scares me. I don't much about HIV, but I sure do know I'm scared of it.

What's more, I'm only capable of protecting myself from HIV/AIDS by putting up a big sign in life that says, NEG ONLY, warning all those who aren't disease-free to stay away from me.

Never mind the fact people lie or don't even know their true status. Never mind the fact that I can have all the great safe sex in the world with a person, regardless of HIV status, and never, ever acquire the virus.

I'm still shutting those non-clean, non-disease-free, dirty, disease-ridden dudes out!

That's right! Either I am ignorant jerk, or I'm a thoughtless jerk. Call me what you want, but, NEG ONLY!

Is Sexy Disease-Free?

They don't own sexy. The "disease-free-UB2" crowd. In fact, they don't own anything but a narrow and thoughtless mind. And a narrow and thoughtless mind is not sexy.

Sexy is all in the head, and so is thinking you're smart by calling yourself "disease-free" and having all the unsafe sex you want with others, just because they also claim to be "clean" and "disease-free."

A truly smart HIV-negative man educates himself on safe sex, and practices risk reduction, same as when he drives a car, walks across the street or goes parachute jumping.

A truly smart HIV-negative man doesn't discriminate against people who are HIV-positive when it comes to sex, love and life, nor does he judge; and he definitely doesn't go around using such an insane, insensitive term like "disease-free."

An HIV-negative man who knows better than that? Now that's sexy.

Is Beauty Disease-Free?

This is me, reminding myself that the self-proclaimed "disease-free" of the world do not set the tone for me, nor do they represent my view of HIV/AIDS.

Could they be more insensitive? Foolish? Thoughtless?

Sometimes I wish I could shove their disease-ridden attitudes up their disease-free asses. But since I'm not here for them, I'll refrain from going postal on them and take comfort that I'm not one of them.

That's right, I'm glad I'm not a thoughtless jerk who goes around proclaiming thoughtless thoughts like, "disease-free, UB2."

Ignorant fools. Don't they know: there's beauty and worth, even in people with AIDS.

Is Your Mind Really Disease-Free?

Does a disease-free label result equal a disease-free mind?

I don't let HIV/AIDS get in the way of me loving myself. Why should you be any different?

See life from my point of view in the funky posts labeled Semper Poz.

Also on my author blog: more of my life with HIV in the posts labeled HIV-P.O.V..

Dream of a Sexy Black Man Living AIDS

When's the last time you heard someone say:

"I just need to find the right black man living with AIDS to settle down with."

"Let's go see this great thriller about a black detective living with AIDS who uncovers a plot to ..."

"Tonight on Deal or No Deal, a black man living with AIDS tries to outwit the banker!"

"This season on The Bachelor, will a black gay man living with AIDS find true love and the man of his dreams?"

"Coming to theaters Friday: the tender love story of an HIV-positive black man who meets a ..."

"Join the outrageous fun in this new, must-see-TV comedy about a black gay man living with AIDS and his ...."

"For more on this story, let's get the perspective of a black man who has been living with AIDS ..."

"This month's book club selection is a wonderful story about a black gay man living with AIDS whose remarkable story has ..."

" ... who, by the way, is living with AIDS in addition to all these other wonderful, great and inspiring things about this man, who, by the way, also happens to be black."

The world is having a hard time imagining someone like me being just like them. Lucky for me, they don't have to. I'm going to imagine it for them.

• Originally published on my author blog.

Black Jock, White Jock

Click here for more funky pics

A Funky Primer

What's guy like me doing a blog like this? Trying to tell the world: Black Man with HIV is Worth a Look.

What makes it hard to find a buddy while living with the virus? Two reasons: So Many Men, So Little Sensitivity.

What keeps my dream of finding true love alive? I keep telling myself, There Must Be Some Buddy.